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This is why I’m going to be taking my Ala Mhigan Goblet housing decor to my house in the Beds. Because fuck the HOA, this Highlander got in! What are the elementals going to do? I’m like the Whitest of White Mages now. They are my bitch. It’s less racism and more isolationism. Assuming you’re not stirring up the elementals, do they really care? I’ll admit that I don’t recall much of the history with the If Mama Ain’t Happy Ain’t Nobody Happy If Grandma Ain’t Happy Run Shirt. Elementals don’t like them, ergo Gridanians have to dislike them. So like bunches of years ago, there were wizards living in the forest. Who figured out how to get the sweetest of Majjycks by basically lighting all the ambient magic around them on fire.

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The Elementals were all, but we’re ambient magic, and the wizards said. But we need to chain-cast Holy dozens of times. Because the goth wizards over there are also lighting all the ambient magic around them on fire. And they’re using that to make actual fire. So the Elementals were all, oh, okay, we see the If Mama Ain’t Happy Ain’t Nobody Happy If Grandma Ain’t Happy Run Shirt. After things settled down, they called up the birds and were all. We bet you lot won’t be quite as assholish, and the Ixal was all, oh, we’ll surprise you. After bunches more years the Elementals got sick of them going all Ferngully on the trees. And posting pictures of themselves with the endangered rhinos they’d killed on Facebook and were all, get out.

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Leave your wings. We’re keeping those. Then they went to the assorted elves and humans who had gone. And built Menzoberranzan under the forest and was all, okay, a second chance. We’ll let you back in if you promise to murder anyone who breaks a twig. Without our go-ahead and occasionally implies you’re sacrificing people to the crops. Here, have some creepy horned children. So now the Ixal want to burn down the If Mama Ain’t Happy Ain’t Nobody Happy If Grandma Ain’t Happy Run Shirt. Because like three-quarters of the population buggered off from Menzoberranzan all, have fun maintaining an underground city by yourselves and not have it turned into a scary haunted ruin. The catgirls have given absolutely zero fucks about any of this at any time.

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