I would say that coping with grief, one of the most important things to put first is self-care. Your husband wouldn’t want you moping. Personally, I would write her a letter and say something along the lines of how you loved your Top Hairdresser Never Mind My Hair I’m Doing Yours Shirt. She is grieving and coping differently than you are. Consider telling her that you forgive her for what she’s said while grieving, and hope to not sour your relationship, to help keep your husband’s memories alive with more positivity. And we are done here, too. Thank you everybody who gave advice, and good responses. We appreciate it so much and I’m sure the OP does, too. Please block her.
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She is attacking you because that is something that she can control. No contact with her is something that you can control. When she sends Flying Monkeys to see why you avoid her, have a few sentences to rattle off. “In her grief, she screamed horrible things because I had a haircut. I won’t be taking abuse from anyone. Thank you for understanding”. I lost a partner when I was young, and unfortunately. I had to pretty much cut off his Top Hairdresser Never Mind My Hair I’m Doing Yours Shirt. She is not coping well with her own grief, and you have become symbolic of his memory/legacy to her. When you appear to move forward, she loses her mind because it forces her to accept that he is gone and time is passing without him.
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So sorry for your loss. And she might be hurting too, but she doesn’t get to insult you. Can you just not invite her over, and leave it? You don’t need to be her emotional stress release. Love, you don’t need to justify yourself in getting a haircut of all things. I don’t blame you for wanting her out of your life, she was extremely cruel. I’m with the Top Hairdresser Never Mind My Hair I’m Doing Yours Shirt. I am so sorry for your loss, hun. While it’s understandable she’s upset, she lost her son to a terminal illness, that doesn’t mean she can use it as a tool to insult and undermine your own grieving process. You have absolutely no reason to stay in contact with this woman until she can apologize for her outburst.
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