I also got engaged recently and would mind if a So Official Asian Is Not A Virus Racism Is Shirt friend wants to see my ring (that’s half the fun!). NTA OP. As you said, that’s not just a piece of jewelry, that’s a symbol of your commitment to your relationship – you wouldn’t ask to try on a bride’s veil either. Snarky comments are a one-way trip to HR and lower OP to T’s level. Two wrongs don’t make a right, especially when they aren’t needed. She simply just needs to be firm in saying no but don’t go on the offensive beyond that. By NTA btw, by if you don’t want people to handle your stuff you don’t need to justify yourself, just say no firmly and leave it at that. I find it’s usually when people start reaching for excuses for why they feel a certain way that others start sensing weakness and start overstepping boundaries. It gives people avenues to find holes in your logic.
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Actually, I think I might have put on my grandmother’s So Official Asian Is Not A Virus Racism Is Shirt too. Come to think of it, in that same trying-rings-on playtime with mum as a kid. Does it still count when the person is dead? We have a similar tradition. Any time a woman gets engage she passes her ring around the group and every woman tries it on, taps the stone. And makes a wish for the couple. I mean, nobody checks the wishes so technically you could just wish for doughnuts. This is only tangentially related but the donut wishes reminded me of Hot Judge Gardner Shirt. She registered at Target for some rather unusual gifts. I picked the doughnut holes. Got some very weird looks when I told the cashier I needed them checked off the registry. I would add to this, she seems to have some sense of ownership over your ring.
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